Timing Is(n't) Everything* (possible language)

Does it ever feel like the world is ... I don't know? Battling you? Caging you in so you feel trapped? Setting you up to fail?

While I know--mentally--that this isn't the truth, let me tell you something: this week has felt like an open and shut case for that.

Last week, amid all the birthday stuff for Babe, a 4 hours round trip day for our son to go see his first college football game, work... Last week it felt like I was KILLING it! Honestly. I was writing words. Lots of words. There were days I hit over 5K words. I was also editing a few previous chapters, reviewing notes from some other authors and my Alphas.

Oh! And I worked on posts. I reached out and got information for upcoming newsletter swaps. Created and updated the spreadsheet I plan to use for tracking, make that part of my life a wee bit easier.

My narrator for Trading Tinsel hit me up with the first round of files for the audiobook. 🤯😲🥰

Damn. Last week was a great week.

Which is partly why this week I feel like a failure.

Monday I had planned to write. The goal was 1,500 words. Nothing crazy, but enough that I would still be on track to meet my deadline. Well, Babe got sick. Have you ever had a grown man get sick? It's not the easiest thing in the world. He wasn't horrible in any way, but it felt like I couldn't do anything. I did a lot of laundry, sure. And we got caught up on a few shows we like to watch together. Definitely filled his "Quality Time" bucket ... but author-y stuff? Nope.

Then, towards the end of the day, I started to get a headache. To be expected. We'd watched a lot of TV. I'd read quite a bit on my phone. Plus, well the weather couldn't make up it's mind. Being as I'm prone to barometric migraines, I wasn't exactly shocked by the headache.

What did shock me? Waking up Tuesday with a sore throat. That wasn't expected. The headache was still there, only now there was a ton of pressure behind my eyeballs. My ears. My temples! Good Lord. I just felt bad.

Worse? Words weren't wording. So I figured I relax in the morning and try to work in the afternoon. Only... you guessed it. Didn't happen. Ended up in Urgent Care for over two hours. Xrays and swabs and all the questions. Some of them I answered four or five times.

Can anyone tell me why the lights in those places are so freaking bright? My migraine was exceptionally pissed at me when I had to look up at the intake nurse, staring directly into a full-wattage light situation.

Anyways. 2+ hours later, they ruled out pneumonia (for now) and Strep. It's early stages bronchitis with--get this--the opportunity to turn into pneumonia. I went from fine to FUCK! in about 24 hours. So...

Babe was great. He picked up my meds, made sure I had lots of water and iced tea (because that's really all I wanted). Kept the kiddos away so my head wouldn't try to detach itself in a fit of self-preservation.

My pittie is the King of Comfort; he has a 6th sense when someone in our family is sick. He will stay by their side all day. Sleep curled up by them. And that's what he did. Normally, when Babe is home, Ace wants to play tug or rough-house with him until it's time for bed. But from the moment I went to lay down, the dog never left my side. The kids were playing as quietly as my kids can play-- which was still louder than I would have liked, but I didn't kept upset; they were really trying. And I could hear Babe downstairs, tidying up, reminding the kids that "Mom's sick; we need to be calm." And still... Ace kept his little pittie chin on my legs.

Today I'm... better? Like I don't feel like I'm wandering aimlessly in the foggy-mist of the 75th Quarter Quell. And my body can distinguish the true temperature; last night it went from me shivering uncontrollably to me sweating profusely. Today I'm just achy all over. Feels like the flu--but that test was negative so I don't know.

Now. The part that has me even writing this post.

Words.

How many words have I written this week?

1,200.

Twelve. Hundred.

That's it.

That's less than my Monday goal, and that's all the words I've written ALL WEEK.

Want to know what else the Fates have decided to lay in my lap?

• My daughter is getting sick. In fact, she stayed home today from school. Luckily she's a good student and I didn't have to talk to her at all about checking in with her teachers about what homework she would need to catch up on; she did that AND even started one or two of the assignments.

• Not one. Not Two. But THREE of my FAVORITE authors released books this week. I finished one, am in the middle of the second, and have downloaded the third. But my headache is making it really difficult to get through these books like I normally world. Too much screen time is a no-go from me. When you add in drafting--on a tablet, and writing this blog post--also on a screen; reading on my phone is not my favorite right now.

• Those audiofiles I was sent over to review? Well, I had told Amber I'd try to finish them by Thursday, send notes by Friday. Migraine means sound sensitivity. So I can't listen to them for nearly as long as I was planning to. They still need to get done if I ever want to get Trading Tinsel to y'all! And considering I've been working on getting this book to Audible since MARCH!... yeah. I don't want to delay this any more than I physically have to.

• ARC. I was gifted an ARC of Tawna Fenske's upcoming release Try Me. The good news there is that this won't release until Dec. 6th, so I've got some time. Thankful for small miracles. I've been holding off on asking for ARCs from Tawna because I have been so busy myself, but her books are incredible and I've had serious FOMO-- I had to at least throw my name in the hat for Try Me. And to get it after all?? Well, I wasn't about to turn it away just because of a little bronchitis!

• My work-work. The job that pays regularly. I still need to go to work but I physically can't. As a dock associate for Amazon's shipping/Fulfillment center--I have a physically demanding job. Considering I've had 1 bowl of soup yesterday and one today; I don't exactly have the energy to even go half-paced at work. So I'm plowing through my PTO (paid time off) and UPT (unpaid time off). Not my favorite thing, but I do have a doctor's note. Fingers crossed they'll accept it and I'll get back at least some of the time lost in my UPT hours.

So yeah. This time last week I was super excited about all these things. ARCs and new releases. Audiofiles and revision notes. Drafting and editing and doing all the author-y things leading into the holiday season. This wasn't on my BINGO Card. But here we are.

I'm going to do what I can, when I can. I'm really trying to ask for help. I was smart enough to have a few "no work" dinners already bought so we can eat at home (vs. getting takeout $$$), but also not have me standing for long periods of time. Pizza tonight sounds like a plan to me!

So yeah. If you're like me and have a hundred things weighing you down. If you feel like the world is conspiring against you. If it just really sucks right now... I get it. I'll tell you what I've been repeating to myself since Monday morning:

"Tomorrow has to be better. Otherwise today... really wasn't that bad."